March

As part of my ’12 months of self control’ project I decided that my challenge for March would be to do with productiveness. I was going to try and wake up at 6:30am on week days to try and do things before work. There was so much I was going to do, pedicures, research, dog walks, exercise, I’d planned so, so, so much yoga. It was going to be great I was going to be so proactive without the mundane feeling of get up, go to work, come home, eat, sleep, get up, repeat. For all the spatial learners out there this was what my mornings would look like;

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Cut to the chase, I failed so hard that it hurts. I considered lying about it in my blog because it was that bad.

Day one: Managed to wake myself up at 6:45 by means of force. I grabbed my laptop and watched Gossip Girl  on Netflix for two hours straight. ‘It’s a start’ I told myself. ‘Tomorrow I’ll do better’.

Day two: Work up half hour before work started.

Day three: Got up at 6:30 because I had college and I had to.

Day four- 31: NOPE.

I learnt that I am incapable of waking up unless I absolutely have to/ I’m really excited because I’m going to the airport and  I know I’m getting a Sausage & Egg McMuffin and a holiday out of it. Apart from that I could quite happily spend 80% of my life sleeping, 10% eating and another 10% drinking Gin. I’m like a fucking Snorlax – the worst Pokémon. Snorlex. Ha.

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12 Months of Self Control

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I’n not religious, I have no obligation to fast during Ramadan, nor do feel the need to give up something for Lent. But for some reason around Christmas time whilst reflecting upon the previous year as we all do, I started thinking about the new year and what I wanted to do with 2015. At first I envisioned going on 10 holidays, winning the lottery and buying myself and my Bestest Baddest Betch (BBB) an insane mansion, not dissimilar to Barbie’s Dream House. Having snapped out of my day dream I decided to set some realistic goals. Something slightly more memorable and worthwhile than a sloppy New Years Resolution that will inevitably get forgotten about mid-March if I was lucky.

Here’s what I came up with;

For each month of 2015 I am going to attempt to either give something up/ attempt a personal challenge. As soon as the month is over, *poof* slate wiped clean, move onto next challenge and evaluate/blog my findings. Why? I have no idea, I guess I’m bored and fancy carrying out a mini social experiment of myself. Me, myself and my very own lab rat (Because who doesn’t love a desperate attempt to slot in a loose Beyoncé reference?). Either way, the fact that I didn’t get round to typing this up until 10th Febuary is not the point, perhaps one of my monthly challenges will be to not be so bloody tardy.

A few of my habits and vices you should get to know; Chocolate, dating, spending money I don’t have, smoking, bread, anything peanut based and heroin. They’re mainly food based because inside I have the heart of Augustus Gloop, except the heroin one, the heroin one isn’t real, but I really like Trainspotting?

People who know me best, I will be calling on you to make some non food based suggestions. Just to clarify as a pre-warning, before everyone jumps on me and tries to suggests it, I absolutely will not give up Gin for any of the twelve months. It goes against my core beliefs and I would rather cut off my right arm. Gin is the glue that holds my whole persona together. None of this ‘dry January’ nonsense for me, thanks.

So who knows? Maybe I will learn something, gain some much needed will power or self control? Maybe it will just be a really boring waste of my time? Maybe I’m just being unrealistic and setting myself up for a fail? With the latter being the more likely option. I’ll give it a shot and let you know. Seeing as it’s already February, I’ll give you a spoiler alert for January’s challenge. I attempted to give up men.

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